TWIMC

It took a while until you accidentally came. It shouldn’t have mattered, but still, it seems like you’re never there. We both know that it’s not gonna work out in the first place. Atleast we tried. Atleast, we both got inspired. But at the back of my mind, I’m still hoping for the ‘what ifs’, I’m still having this make-believe that somehow, we really deserve each other.

So now, I can only say thank you, sorry, good luck and good bye. Thanks for your time! I just want you to know that I’ll always be thankful that you spent your time just to make me happy even for a short time. I don’t really care if this was all temporary. I’m just here, I’ll always be here. You were the only person who’d ever made me feel loved, and suddenly you took me for granted. I know that most of the time, it was actually my fault. Sorry for being so clingy. Sorry if you always get irritated because of me. Sorry because this is how I’ll always be. I know that by reading this, you’ll say that I always say sorry for no reason. I couldn’t stop blaming myself for being so attached. You know I tried too hard, but it’s just that it’s all I know I have. Well, I wish you good luck. I hope you’ll be happy and successful in your life, even if I will not be a part of it anymore.  But just now, as I listen to sad songs, it seemed like yesterday. Tears strung my eyes and peaked down my face as I sat here waiting, trying to be strong alone. I really don’t want to say good bye, but I know I have to. There’s no ‘Us’ even from the start and there will be no ‘Us’ at the end of this ride. I won’t say good bye just to let go and forget you. But nonetheless, I’ll bid good bye hoping you’ll realize that I am worth the fight. -Daar

by: MISS TAKEN FOR GRANTED

"It hurts when the person that made you feel special yesterday, makes you feel unwanted today."

More often than not, it’s all about the small things that you think won't matter. If you want to keep someone important around you, you should always make her feel it. If there’s anything a woman extremely dislikes, it’s being taken for granted. It should also feel so effortless if you really think that she rightfully deserves your attention.

We, women would always yearn for appreciation. We don’t like going against people we covet to make an impact on or to win them over. We habitually have room for whatever thing you say, and we will do everything we can just to please you in the anticipation of winning your affection. Hearing a small line of compliments from you would mean the world to us.

Moreover, we usually give more than we typically get back. We just don’t know when to stop giving and we can’t help it. That’s why we always end up giving way too much before we even become conscious about it. And by then, it’s perhaps too late for the reason that the person we’re giving it to, may already be taking us for granted. We consequently can’t say ‘NO’ when it comes to the people we truly treasure and love. We have an awfully stiff time waning something to people. We’d rather take risk than decline. You may think we’re just being sweet, caring and too clingy sometimes, but we love genuinely, and that’s a fact.

        But like every other beings, we also get tired of this long-lived dilemma. We usually strive hard in order for us to overcome this feeling of being unnoticed and unappreciated by the people whom we really want to be a part of our lives. So if ever you realize that you have taken us for granted, always remember that you are always free to make it work the way we wanted it to be. And without a doubt, we’re just a text or a phone call away. 

My billet-doux for Essays.ph

                

Billet-doux (French:  literally, sweet note or love letter) I ought to have my word for the day when I was still in college. I search for unusual words that I can use when I am writing. I even scan throughout the dictionary just to look for words that were unfamiliar, have attention-grabbing pronunciations, and especially those who have meanings I can relay to.

I am always fond of writing about everything I am interested and curious about. I am not the type that is proficient about the know-hows in formal writing and stuff, I just usually jot down words I heard randomly or at some instance, I just literally put my feelings on paper. Basically, I would always write at times when I am depressed or when something pops out of my mind. As I always say, I would rather write than talk.  ‘Twas my legit fall back from reality, to be able to profess my views and beliefs. Well, I never assumed that my paper works were useless, but sometimes, I might think of it as a taken for granted bits and pieces of who I really am.

Until one day, I was just surfing the net and I thought of searching for a part time job mainly being an online writer since I have a night shift job, and I supposed I have lots of free time to make this interest more interesting. I really didn’t expect that I will be accepted as a writer at essays.ph, which was definitely a blast. Mind you, that really came to a realization that I am not just nothing when it comes to writing, that I can also do it creatively and put my heart into every word I will inscribe with my pen or my keyboard, and don’t forget about the bonus points that will surely keep every writer on track.

So, what are the perks of being an essays.ph writer? Well, aside from the online convenience and an opportunity to all frustrated and aspiring writers like me who cannot make it a full-time career, they offer the kind of appreciation I would always crave for. Rather than being content of just having your writing skills hidden, you will get paid in every work/assignment you will be doing with them. You can also interact and share your thoughts to others writers, be friends with them and also learn from them. So there, as simple as ABC but as challenging yet fulfilling kind of satisfaction every writer would want to develop and acquire.

Lastly, one would not become a writer just for the sake of producing money. A writer will never be disheartened. They will not stop writing because it’ll always be their passion, for writers will always be writers, writing from their hearts and sharing stories once ignored and often untold. I can also say that as for me, writing (and reading as well) will always be a part of me. I would always want to share my thoughts and believe that I can also inspire other people with my words.

P.S.

Just keep in mind: “Writing could be a fulfilling, flexible, and fun career at http://www.essays.ph/!"

BASS

When I first saw you, I wasn’t sure if the person on my mind was really you. I watched the live performance of you and the band for the first time. I took photos of you in order to share them with my friends since they know you more than I do. Perhaps, I just knew your face and your name; nothing more, nothing less. But there was this one time when I sent you a tweet and you replied back. Right after that, I was so amazed how you suddenly knew my name the first time we had the chance to talk to each other, and that meant a lot to me. From that day on, I got to know you better on Facebook, Twitter and gigs. I also got the chance to chat you on Facebook, and I admit I became too attached. Sorry if it seemed like I always wanted your attention, maybe it’s just because what I feel was new to my system that’s why I reacted more expressively than other people around. But more than that, I want to thank you. Thank you for always being kind and approachable. It’s such a great feeling that I had the opportunity to be a fan of the band, to be your friend and a girl who only wanted to be appreciated like how you did, and the way you did it. Well, I could not tell stories of each and every gig I had attended. But believe me when I say that those memories will never be forgotten and will forever be treasured. And there was this one time, one gig that would always haunt me, a surreal moment that struck me deep within. Yes, that was really how it matters until now. You congratulated me on my achievements. You said I’m cute, which was kind of disturbing knowing the fact that I’m too young for you. You placed your arm on my shoulders like you’re a brother. You held my hand and played with it for a while. And when it’s time to say goodbye, you kissed my forehead. I was aware that you’re drunk that time but it really didn’t matter. I still believe that you know what you’re doing then, and I got dumbfounded. I didn’t know what to feel and what to react at that very moment. It left me hanging for days, weeks, months and even as of this day. I know that I should not expect anything from you or from anyone else. I am truly aware that I am not the type that you’ll like or love romantically. Maybe those were just friendly gestures you always do even to other girls around, who you got to hang out with. I know there are many girls out there who also feel the same way like I do towards you. But then, even if it feels weird now, I just wanted you to know that for me, you really are a great catch. You’re the boyfriend material. How I hope and wish to be loved by you in return but I know it’ll never gonna happen. By the way, ‘twas nice to know you, I’ll find someone like you, SOON.

TAKE ME AS I AM

I just want to relinquish everything that makes me in such a way inconsolable. I'm tired of being clogged up for the reason that being me is not enough to prove that I deserve to be here. I feel troubled and uneasy because nobody's here to defend me on whatever instance it may be.

Why does it have to be so vague? How can I work it out? How can I be someone they look forward to? Why can't I tell them that what I just really wanted is to be appreciated - someone enough to be noticed?

I offered everything i could give. I controlled my anger and put patience in every part of the way. Yet, I couldn't get my prize. Still, they took me for granted. Until one day, I felt exhaustion. I became tired enduring the pain and the delays without complaint. My perseverance and care didn't seem to work. I'm still their peevish laughing stock. So I decided to let go of the people and the things that hurt me. I realized that I don't have to be stuck here just to be in line with them. I can do it on my own; I can be the best even if I'm not trying too hard. I just have to believe in myself even more.

There are times when I carry my self-effacement to extremes. I tend to excuse others' behavior and make too many demands on myself. Under such a self-imposed rule, my emotions become strained, I become excitable and my temper can flare up and explode. I have a terrible fear of being betrayed and any infringement on my principles can incite my anger. I can say that my will is astonishing, not so much for its intensity, but for its quality.

I am happiest when I'm sharing and giving of myself. My intellect is holistic instead of analytic. I have a fine memory especially on events that have emotional charge or meaning to me. I am also very emotional by nature, but my morals do not allow me to be flippant about my affections; they're delivered from the heart.

OVERDUE

It's hard to trust someone, especially if you know that he/she can make a bluff out of everything. It has been awhile, but it seemed like it was all the same - same ache, same feeling, same kick, same LOVE. All this time, I'm trapped and cornered, like I'm getting nowhere. All along, I thought I have moved on and I can just throw it all away. But time passed by, and now, in just a glimpse, everything comes back like there's nothing happened. Somewhat, it feels like it hasn't been years of waiting. I feel that it's a brand new day, a new start for me to find out what has been lost. But suddenly, I came to a realization that somehow, it can be true, it can be a frank or it can be just a wild joke. How will I know? How can I possibly figure out what's wrong if the moment feels so right for me - if I love it all through out? Even If i know that it is impossible; that it can't be real. Why? Because I just know it since Day 1. I know it can't be me, it won't be me, and it's merely not me. But still, I pushed through. I made it a try because it's all I ever wanted. Unfortunately, luck is not on my side. I just have to let it go. Maybe, it's just their way of saying, "Happy Birthday! This one's for you temporarily. Just for us to see how you will react and how you'll be happy in this short span of time." See? I am wrongly overwhelmed.

muddle-headed

if there's someone that i'll always remember,

it will be the person who made me fall deeper.

like memories that seem to be a scar,

perhaps, it won't be swept away too far.

there are times i get so scared and confused,

when everything happens has no sense and no use.

though i can never turn back time,

is it wrong for me to wish he was mine?

if ever he realized that i'm always here,

he just have to say so, and try to get near.

i'll be satisfied enough just to see him happy,

even if i know that the reason is not me.

inconsolable

tell me how can i give up someone,

if in my heart, i know he's the one.

i always remember all he shares,

don't even know if he really cares.

he said i have to move on now,

didn't he feel that i am hurt somehow?

i never expected anything,

but his words had kept me believing.

now he said he's the one mistaken,

he told me not to feel unspoken.

though i'm so inlove to let go,

this love is too defenseless, i know.